美國(guó)大學(xué)入學(xué)申請(qǐng)書范本
篇一:申請(qǐng)美國(guó)大學(xué)入學(xué)文書范本
I guess it was inevitable that I’d be on hockey skates at some point in my life, but I did not expect that I’d become one of a rare group of female ice hockey officials before I even reached high school. Being born into a family of hockey players and figure skaters, it seemed that my destiny had already been decided.
Right from the beginning, my two older brothers and my father strapped me up and threw me onto the ice. I loved it and, in my mind, I was on my way to becoming a female Gretzky! But my mom had to think of something fast to drag her little girl away from this sport of ruffians. Enter my first hot pink figure skating dress! That was all it took to launch fifteen years of competitive figure skating. Even though figure skating soon became my passion, I always had an unsatisfied yearning for ice hockey. It took a great deal of convincing from my parents that competitive figure skating and ice hockey didn’t mix. My compromise became refereeing ice hockey; little did I know that I was beginning an activity that would influence my character and who I am today. When I began, I would only work with my dad and brothers. Everyone was friendly and accepting because I had just started. I soon realized though that to get better I needed to start refereeing with people I wasn’t related to, and that’s when my experience drastically changed. An apologetic smile and an “I’m sorry” wasn’t going to
get me through games now. As I began officiating higher-level games and dealing with more arrogant coaches, I suddenly entered a new male-dominated world, a world I had never experienced before. My confidence was shot, and all I wanted to do was get through each game and be able to leave. Sometimes I was even too scared to skate along the teams’ benches because I would get upset by what the coaches would yell to me. “Do you have a hot date tonight, ref?” was a ty//deadspacehorror.com/picment that coaches would spit at me during the course of a game. In their eyes, I did not belong on that ice, and they were going to do whatever they could do to make sure no women wanted to officiate their games. I was determined not to let them chase me off the ice.
I made the decision to stand up for myself. I never responded rudely to the coaches, but I did not let them walk all over me and destroy my confidence anymore. I started to act and feel more like the 4-year certified Atlantic District Official that I am. There were still a few situations that scared me. One time I called a penalty in a championship game during the third overtime and the team I penalized ended up losing because they got scored on. I knew I had made the right call, even though I was unnerved when I saw the losing teams’ parents waiting for me at my locker room; for the moment I wished I hadn’t called that penalty. Although it was scary at the time, I stood my ground and overcame my fears. That was an important
stepping-stone in my officiating career and in my life.
After four years of refereeing, I still can’t say it’s easy. Every game hands me something new and I never know what to expect. Now I have the confidence and preparation to deal with the unexpected, on and off the ice. I now also know to take everything with a grain of salt and not let it get to me. I have learned that life is just like being out on the ice; if I am prepared and act with confidence, I will be perceived as confident. These are the little lessons that I’m grateful to have learned as a woman referee.
Things to Notice About This Essay
1. The author tells an interesting story about her experiences as a referee.
2. A sense of her personality—determination, flexibility, good humor—comes through in the narration.
3. Details like “Do you have a hot date tonight, ref?” make the narration memorable (we’d love to hear more of these kinds of details).
4. The essay needs a faster start. The first paragraph (three sentences) says the same thing in both the first and third sentences—and gives away the essay’s surprise in the second! A good revision would all of paragraph one and start at paragraph two.
5. There’s too much frame here and not enough picture. The essay needs further development, especially about the difficulties of
becoming and being a ref, to keep it vivid.
6. The author should “dwell” in the meaning of the experience a little more at the end—“I wonder about…I also think…Sometimes I believe….” Significant experiences like this one, woven through many years of the author’s life, don’t mean just one thing—there are more insights and lessons to explore here.
篇二:申請(qǐng)國(guó)外大學(xué)的范文和指導(dǎo)
除了通用申請(qǐng)的Essay之外,有些學(xué)校還提供另外寫一篇Essay的機(jī)會(huì)。有些學(xué)校讓你在他們提供的題目中作出選擇;而有些學(xué)校則沒(méi)有任何限制。比如耶魯大學(xué)的要求非常簡(jiǎn)單,只是要求你寫一篇500單詞以內(nèi)的你想讓耶魯閱讀的Essay即可,基本沒(méi)有任何限制。哈佛大學(xué)也是讓你自行決定寫什么內(nèi)容、什么題目,只不過(guò)給出了幾個(gè)可能的寫作題目建議:
a) 你生命中的一個(gè)不尋常經(jīng)歷;
b) 你在其他國(guó)家旅行和生活的經(jīng)歷;
c) 對(duì)你最具影響力的書;
d) 某學(xué)術(shù)經(jīng)歷(課程、研究項(xiàng)目、論文、或研究課題);
e) 過(guò)去一年中你讀過(guò)的一系列圖書。
請(qǐng)記住,這些只是哈佛建議的題目,決不是要限制你從中挑選,你完全可以自定題目來(lái)寫。
題目樣本
請(qǐng)?zhí)峁┠愕膫�(gè)人自傳及解釋你的教育目標(biāo)。
挑選并詳細(xì)描述一次值得紀(jì)念或具代表性的生活經(jīng)驗(yàn),好讓我們對(duì)你有更深入的了解。
描述你的一次最幽默或最尷尬的經(jīng)驗(yàn)。
你的教育和事業(yè)目標(biāo)是什么?這所大學(xué)能怎樣幫助你達(dá)到這些目標(biāo)? 你為何會(huì)選擇現(xiàn)在的學(xué)習(xí)科目?而你又會(huì)怎樣將你所學(xué)的回饋家國(guó)? 描述生活中一些啟發(fā)你成長(zhǎng)或你從中有所得著的事件。
描寫你在家鄉(xiāng)在2100年的生活。
如果你可以遇見(jiàn)某個(gè)已去世的人,并可與他交談,你希望遇見(jiàn)誰(shuí)又會(huì)和他說(shuō)些甚么?
提示:簡(jiǎn)介影響你選擇主修科目的因素,特別注意那些引導(dǎo)你選擇研究這些課程的經(jīng)驗(yàn)或想法。
入學(xué)申請(qǐng)文章的目的
你的文章較你的學(xué)業(yè)成績(jī)或推薦書更能讓入學(xué)委員會(huì)了解你的自我和性情。 你能藉此向入學(xué)委員會(huì)介紹你特別的地方,從而顯示出你是與眾不同。
如你的'學(xué)業(yè)成績(jī)記錄顯示弱點(diǎn),例如你在某一班或某次考試有問(wèn)題,你可藉此文章去解釋或彰顯你的長(zhǎng)處。
向校方顯示你的寫作能力。
當(dāng)有關(guān)的委員會(huì)難以決定是否接受你的申請(qǐng)時(shí)?這篇文章可顯示你的認(rèn)真度以作最後決定。
寫作提示
應(yīng)該做的
仔細(xì)閱讀題目并花多些時(shí)間去思考。
保證你沒(méi)有問(wèn)非所答。
與你的父母、朋友或教師討論該題目。
同樣認(rèn)真地回答那些短問(wèn)答。當(dāng)被問(wèn)及你參與課外活動(dòng)的表現(xiàn)時(shí),應(yīng)列舉你花費(fèi)大多數(shù)時(shí)間參加的幾個(gè)活動(dòng)來(lái)回答,并說(shuō)出該些活動(dòng)對(duì)你的意義。
花費(fèi)幾天的時(shí)間去思考題目及準(zhǔn)備寫作。
先做一個(gè)大綱及組織文章的內(nèi)容。
寫一個(gè)初稿:使用一種簡(jiǎn)單的文體和語(yǔ)調(diào)寫作,并力求簡(jiǎn)潔。使用你感舒適的字眼,有助別人更易於理解你的想法。讓別人過(guò)目并對(duì)你的草稿提出意見(jiàn)。 改正和修輯你的文章。
整齊寫出或者打印出你的終稿。
校對(duì)你的文章。
不應(yīng)做的
不要只是重復(fù)你已經(jīng)填寫過(guò)的資料。
不要詳述或恭維你想申請(qǐng)的學(xué)院。委員會(huì)想要知道的是有關(guān)你的東西,而非該學(xué)校的情況。
不要以相同的散文套用在不同的學(xué)院。
不要寫一些你不知道或認(rèn)識(shí)的東西。
不要使用艱深的字眼以圖使委員會(huì)對(duì)你有更佳的印象,你可能會(huì)錯(cuò)漏百出。使用簡(jiǎn)單、易於理解的字眼去清楚表達(dá)自己更為重要。
不要請(qǐng)其他人代寫你的文章,因委員會(huì)通常都能夠辨別出來(lái)。如果他們查明屬實(shí),你可能會(huì)被取消資格。
動(dòng)筆前至少應(yīng)該花上1到2個(gè)星期的時(shí)間去考慮短文的主題。在這個(gè)過(guò)程中,你會(huì)發(fā)現(xiàn)許多以前從未想到過(guò)的題目。以下一些問(wèn)題僅供參考。 你是怎么一個(gè)人?
自己最突出的個(gè)性是什么?有那些人生態(tài)度、品質(zhì)或技巧是在平常人中比較少見(jiàn)的?你為什么會(huì)有這樣的人生態(tài)度?
你的朋友怎么看你?如果是由他們來(lái)執(zhí)筆他們會(huì)怎么寫? 你喜歡什么書籍、電影、藝術(shù)品?它們對(duì)你有什么影響?你為什么喜歡這些東西? 你有沒(méi)有經(jīng)歷過(guò)頓悟的感覺(jué)? 你做過(guò)什么?你最大的成就是什么?為什么你覺(jué)得它重要? 除了讀書以外,你干過(guò)些什么你覺(jué)得學(xué)校會(huì)因此對(duì)你產(chǎn)生興趣的東西?哪些對(duì)你來(lái)說(shuō)最有意義?是否嘗試過(guò)努力爭(zhēng)取并實(shí)現(xiàn)了自己的目標(biāo)?成功的原因是什么?有沒(méi)有曾經(jīng)努力爭(zhēng)取卻失敗的經(jīng)歷?失敗后自己是怎么面對(duì)的 一生中最困難的時(shí)候是什么?為什么?你的人生觀因此發(fā)生了什么變化? 你想往哪個(gè)方向發(fā)展？現(xiàn)在最想做的是什么?最想到什么地方?在生人和死者中,有哪一個(gè)是你最希望可以同行的?
你對(duì)將來(lái)有什么抱負(fù)?30年后的今天,有哪些事情會(huì)令自己引以為豪?目前申請(qǐng)的這所學(xué)校在哪方面可以幫助你到達(dá)成功的彼岸?為什么你要選擇這所學(xué)校度過(guò)往后2到6年的時(shí)間?
Too Easy to Rebel
In my mother’s more angry and disillusioned moods, she often declares that my sisters and I are “smarter than is good” for us, by which she means we are too ambitious, too independent-minded, and somehow, subtly un-Chinese. At such times, I do not argue, for I realize how difficult it must be for her and my father—having to deal with children who reject their simple idea of life and threaten to drag them into a future they do not understand.
For my parents, plans for our futures were very simple. We were to get good grades, go to good colleges, and become good scientists,
mathematicians, or engineers. It had to do with being Chinese. But my sisters and I rejected that future, and the year I came home with Honors in English, History and Debate was a year of disillusion for my parents. It was not that they weren’t proud of my accomplishments, but merely that they had certain ideas of what was safe and solid, what we did in life. Physics, math, turning in homework, and crossing the street when Hare Krishnas were on our side—those things were safe. But the Humanities we left for Pure Americans.
Unfortunately for my parents, however, the security of that world is simply not enough for me, and I have scared them more than once with what they call my “wild” treks into unfamiliar areas. I spent one afternoon interviewing the Hare Krishnas for our school newspaper—and they nearly called the police. Then, to make things worse, I decided to enter the Crystal Springs Drama contest. For my parents, acting was something Chinese girls did not do. It smacked of the bohemian, and was but a short step to drugs, debauchery, and all the dark, illicit facets of life. They never did approve of the experience—even despite my second place at Crystal Springs and my assurances that acting was, after all, no more than a whim.
What I was doing when was moving away from the security my parents prescribed. I was motivated by my own desire to see more of what life had to offer, and by ideas I’d picked up at my Curriculum Committee meetings. This committee consisted of teachers who felt that students should learn to understand life, not memorize formulas; that somehow our college preparatory curriculum had to be made less rigid. There were English teachers who wanted to integrate Math into other more “important” science courses, and Math teachers who wanted to abolish English entirely.
There were even some teachers who suggested making Transcendental Meditation a requirement. But the common denominator behind these
slightly eccentric ideas was a feeling that the school should produce more thoughtful individuals, for whom life meant more than good grades and Ivy League futures. Their values were precisely the opposite of those my parents had instilled in me.
It has been a difficult task indeed for me to reconcile these two opposing impulses. It would be simple enough just to rebel against all my parents expect. But I cannot afford to rebel. There is too much that is
fragile—the world my parents have worked so hard to build, the security that comes with it, and a fading Chinese heritage. I realize it must be immensely frustrating for my parents, with children who are persistently “too smart” for them and their simple idea of life, living in a land they have come to consider home, and yet can never fully understand. In a way, they have stopped trying to understand it, content with their own little microcosms. It is my burden now to build my own, new world without shattering theirs; to plunge into the future without completely letting go of the past. And that is a challenge I am not at all certain I can meet. 點(diǎn)評(píng)Comments:
1.This is a good strong statement about the dilemma of being a part of two different cultures. The theme is backed by excellent examples of the conflict and the writing is clear, clean, and crisp. The essay then concludes with a compelling summary of the dilemma and the challenge it presents to the student.
2.A masterful job of explaining the conflict of being a child of two cultures. The writer feels strongly about the burden of being a first generation American, but struggles to understand her parents’ perspective. Ultimately she confesses implicitly that she cannot
understand them and faces her own future. The language is particularly impressive:“It smacked of the bohemian,” “subtly unChinese,” and “a fading Chinese heritage.” That she is not kinder to her parents does not make her unkind, just determined.
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